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If a man does not have a good relationship with his mother is it impossible for him to treat women well? I’m not referring to men that aren’t ‘momma’s boys’ per se. I’m referring to the men whose mothers are drug addicted, neglectful, abusive, or absent all together.



I believe we’ve all heard that the way a man treats his mother is the way he will treat his woman. What if his mother was never a ‘real’ mother?  



If a boy grows up:

a) Without a mother (in foster care, adopted, or raised by relatives)

b) Knowing his mother is sleeping around with different men (be it for financial reasons to ‘make ends meet’, for pure pleasure, or due to failed relationships)

c) Watching his mother abuse drugs and/or alcohol

d) Watching his mother be physically abused, being abused himself (either by his mother or someone else)

e) In a environment where he his needs are not provided for (a stable home, clothes, regular meals, supervision, discipline & most of all love)



can he still feel & show love for women or has all his love, faith & trust been destroyed?



I was in a very long relationship with a man that (in my opinion) has a very low opinion of women. I’m not sure if he feels the same way about all women, but he only dates Black women. I do believe the way he feels has a lot to do with his childhood experiences. He and his mother both have told me about things that I feel affected him for life (ex. his mom dated a few married men while he was growing up – she was a single mom trying to make it & they helped her out financially; she began dating a man that was she knew was dating her best friend; before he was born she lied to his father telling him he wasn’t the father – he & his dad do not have a relationship to this day). I truly believe all of those things have a lot to do with his lack of respect for women & relationships.



I heard a handsome, young, professional black man say that any woman that ends up with him for a boyfriend or husband is going to catch hell. His mother has been a drug addict for years, and he feels he simply cannot trust women.



What are your thoughts?