GLIMPSES

who is hiding in that body

that dry vessel

which you are smothered in

pushed in by time

what neurons misfire

tongue that won’t wag

fingers that won’t grip

eyes which are clouded by dementia

who is in there?

in that body that

breathes

eats

moves

lives?

skin transparent

veins visible and countable

thick and ropy

hair sparse and thin

gray

black

white

coarse

baby fine

baby.

that’s what you are

innocent to who you are

where you are

what you used to be

is it a living death?

do you know that you suffer?

or is it sweet oblivion of your twilight years

and it is only us who remember what you once were that suffer?

labored breathing

labored living

are you weary?

is there rest in your mind?

or is it unnecessary to rest

when you can no longer tax yourself that way again?

dumb and deaf

silent, mute

babbling, incoherent

constantly moving

never stirring

what makes your hands so sticky?

it is a remembrance of the meal you had

that lingers on your face and clothes

it is the saliva from the corners of your mouth you can’t control

do you feel those tears sliding down your face?

do you even know why you are crying them?

do you ever reminisce about who you were?

do you hate who you are?

can you tell the difference?

is there a person paralyzed in you

who can see the invisible barrier

which separates comprehension from ignorance

but cannot flail your bony, knarled fists against it? to communicate

retaliate

but are there

smiles to be had?

laughter to be voiced?

days for you that aren’t stretched into eternity’s

or days that you can remember at all?

i can only go on believing that in that vessel there is a spark

a vital part of you that needs to be

touched

loved

spoken to and needed

even though I might not know you need me in return

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