Creativity Lost, Everything Lost

I may as well be underground because
Sharing the same plane of existance
Is stealing any hope away from being sane again
 
I can't believe I'm down so hard
That I was so blind
That I let it all slide
Away from me and out of view
 
This hurt, this loss, this newfound feeling
I made it myself
Over years of not caring
Of hiding away any true way to feel
I'm sober
I'm blasted
This doesn't feel real
 
I may as well be underground
And long forgotten because
This is the furthest I've managed to run
 
Here, sitting here, writing all this shit down
I'm quiet, I'm small
I can't believe I made you fall
So hard
Like this
Before
Over
And over
 
How could I?
How could I?
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