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I'm not who you think I am

I'm not that girl

If you found my true self

I'm sure it would rock your world.

I have a big secret

one that I simply cannot share.

I'd rather die before I did

or rip out all my hair.

This secret sits on my shoulder

and never leaves my side

Even if I wanted to go

there isn't a place I could hide.

Sometimes I sicken even myself,

so much I can't stand what I see.

that I must lie to all those I meet,

because they can't know the real me.

I'm sure there is someone out there

who could possibly understand.

Who would chose to remain by my side

and lend a helping hand.

This secret would shock my family

and make my mother cry.

It would make my father disappointed

and make me want to die....

Well, more than now,

because I already do.

and now I have shared

my secret with you.

You may not have caught it

or missed a beat.

So one time only

I will repeat:

I hate myself inside and out

and I WANT to die.

I wish I were a normal girl,

but I'm not, don't know why.

I've always felt trapped inside my head

though I'm not sure how it came about.

Now everyday I secretly worry

that my secrets will get out.

So now that I have told you all

this secret that I've slipped.

Please keep it to yourselves

and don't let it leave your lips.

For if you do I shall die,

or simply float away

under the current of judgement

and what others will most likely say.

Then again maybe I should

just let you all tell.

Then I could get someone's help

for me to get well.

But until then I guess

this is a secret we shall own.

And hopefully I'll no longer,

go through this alone