MAMA FRED

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JOURNAL #19

what can I say about my sweet Mama Fred

what have I though maybe not in my

many poems exactly left hanging about

still completely said

well on the subject of lying

she's set against it straight away dead

she believes in God, love and happiness

but not that each and every one of us

were necessarily meant to be wed

you see Madame Fred's sole purpose to her

way of thinking is to be the best possible

loving mother to her four children

as well as it seems

confidant

confessor

father and financial loaner

its a lovingly close but sometimes misplaced

relationship

though I love her more and more as the time

passes

I realize that we are not exactly at all

like each or the other

but she is my one truly deepest human

emotional attachment

a mental mentor of mine if you will

best friend to my spirit

and I'm so terribly lucky to have her

I don't like to think about her eventual

death

but the necessity for future preparation

forces my reluctant mind to consider all

possibilities end

with a stronger by day and ever growing

belief in God its easier to imagine my letting

her go when she dies

because I know that I shall be with her one day

in a far more loving and warm and wonderful

place

happy with all of us at home together again

our true home but this time with Daddy and

Tootsie too

celebrating that life together

alas is forever

until God will see us all through............

(Jan. 21, 1999)


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