you mark my whispers
with the wicked wet trail
of your clever tongue
yet make light of fibs I once told
just to get your heated attention
you smile tenderly
when I bury my embarrassed face in
the solid comfort of your always
offered shoulder
and nibble affectionately at my fingers
when I become far too playful to be on
public display
such care took me by surprise
I didn't exactly want you to be The One
I mean that wasn't suppose to be in the cards
I thought you were meant to be my sweet tender
buddy
some sort of better than a big brother
the best male friend that I never before ever
had
the voice of reason that slaps my conscience
whenever I am bad
that is your role
not my lover
and yet
now I can hardly stop myself
from thinking about you
what do you think about when you are making love
what do you look like when you are sleeping
how do you treat a woman you are in love with
what makes your breath catch
your palms sweat
your heart pound
and here you are
sitting right here beside me
and you don't even have the vaguest clue
so how can I ask you
my objective trusted confidant
just what it is that I should do
when all I want to do is kiss you
I'm so on my own in this laughable madness
I'm not sure if I like it or you for that
matter
for letting this become just what it has
a fearful step into the void of the unknown
tonight
at this very moment
I can't help but wonder
just where is your heart in all this
though fearfully confused
still I pray
please let it not be in the palm of another
more foolish woman's hand
I couldn't take that blow just yet
in my fear silently I ask
give this fledgling love time to grow
precious and dear newly discovered heart
and for your kind patience
I shall weave joy into the incredible web of
our already highly cherished unique friendship.......
(May12,1999)