It was a comedy club
and the table
was really close;
three feet from the stage;
seemed like a good thing.
You get the close up view
and can see the comic’s face
and their expressions.
It was Tommy Chong
and he eventually got around
to his doggie routine;
first lifting the leg as if to pee
and then turning into horn dog.
He runs into the crowd
simulating four leg walking
searching for a leg to hump.
Before I realize it,
I find myself getting
Goosed by Tommy Chong;
He’s a rabid dog in heat.
My friends (and the audience)
are howling with laughter.
I just sat there
and passively took it.
I’m thinking, “Thank God
my father’s not alive to see this.”
Surely this moment
inspires pride in any parent.
“Mom, Dad, Guess what happened
at the club last night?”
I got goosed by Tommy Chong
and did nothing about it.
But if he ever
gets elected to the Senate;
I’m taking his ass down.