Never Thought There'd be You

I got to the point in my life from waiting for you...

To thinking there'd never be a you...

Not long after what had felt like my world began to crumble...

A new home that actually feels like a home came and begin to build into my life.

Loss occured along the way but not because of us.

A stroke who took my grandmother from us, heart failure that took my grandfather from us, and covid-19 who took away my adoptive Father...

Inside I'm still screaming...

I miss my kids too I grieve too for what isn't gone...

My heart understood yours...

You stood by me through it all when everyone else left for less.

I adore that you find me worth it, when I don't.

I love you so much! Xoxo! 

Life without you wasn't really living I kept waiting to die.

Disappointed every time I'd open my eyes...

Until the day the I saw you...

Then they had a reason to want to open every day. 

You're perfect just as you are.

I adore you...

My perfect 10.

My everything...

I was dead until you...

Sometimes I wish I'd met you sooner but I remember who I was too...

I think I needed to be this version of myself first to be perfect for you and that's why it took this long...

I have never love anyone or anything more.

I don't know how I lived without you but I never want to again.

You are more then the light in my life, you're my reason why...

Why I get up again, and again, and again.

Never Thought There'd be a You...

You're the whole a was looking for...

No, never thought there'd be a you...


Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is about my spouse as of January...my own perfect 10 I never thought I'd meet who truly seems to love me as I do them...I've never felt precious until them...I never thought I'd wake determined to be someone else's perfect as much as I do with them in my life. They're my priority...I adore them...I love them...life without them wasn't life and life without them i don't ever want to know again...xoxo I hope they stay always...

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louder than words

I am not seperate from the whole.

Every particle of the ocean speaks to me.

The movement of the oceanbody is the movement of mine.

My personality is a seperate wave.

Words can not express such deep feelings and knowings,

So we listen in silence

giving our full attention.

We tend to believe that when we speak

we will be heard the loudest.

Through the force of words we will get our point across.

But there is a great power,

a movement that occurs,

a shift that takes place,

in silence.

There is a healing that words could never say.

We believe our seperate words are powerful,

But silence is the whole.

It is not our breath that moves the world

But the power that breathes life into us

and in which can breathe through us

if we honor silence

and listen

truly listen

to the whole.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Meditation is not about becoming a better person or becoming "enlightened." The art of mindfulness is to realize and feel all that you already are. This is it. Here now. There is no where to go. You are already all that you seek to be. There is nothing to seek. The action of seeking will never allow you to reach what it is you are reaching for-  It is already in your hand. Observe yourself as you are right now without judgement. No matter what you are feeling or thinking, be the eternal divine observer you truly are, and without judgement, emanate the light of your true self onto all. Love the splintered aspects of your ego personality. Do not take them personally. For you are LOVE. You are not your thoughts and wounds. You are the divine eternal healer. Allow your heart to be ruler of your body once again.  There is no where to be. No where to go. You are already here. now.

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My Other Half

You are the logic to my fantasy,
The humor to my furrowed brow,
You opened my eyes so I could see,
And made my frown turn upside down.
I love you so much it aches,
But not in a sorrowful way,
Like the feeling you get when
Someone takes your breath away.
For these reasons I see you,
Not as better, oh no....
You are my other half...
The one who makes me whole.
Brandy Noelle Souza

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Dedicated to my husband

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