2002 Poetry

all that

we were

had done good to me

all that we had

did meaningful things

to me

all that we ever said

were said


all that we knew

was like razor blade

cutting us through

all that we felt

were a lifetime rapture

to treasure

all the days

that passed by

did not just pass by

all the emptiness  

that shrouded my nights

thinking about you

the thought

of our yesterdays

will stay behind

and if in the end

our path may never

cross again

I do so intently pray

I’d be remembered just as

I beautifully remember you.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A lost Love hope to meet in the next life
written: 01/31/2002

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Tidal defiance dares me,
the tides are red with blood,
camel's eyes eyes are lifeless lamps.

Being bleeds and Caesar-like,
drained of life I seek the hand,
For whose stab I march ahead.

They all say,
and profess,
That they all know me.

Only my God --
Without a doubt --
Does full knows me.

Seeking love ruined me,
I accept no 'reality',
Everything fools us completely.

They cannot see the real me,
Their eyes lack the sight to see,
My heart's redness in the sea.

So, let the sea laugh and roar,
Let stormy winds howl and shriek,
My grief stays inside me.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Composed on Jan 24, 2002 and revised on July 20, 2002.

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Tears slowly go down my cheeks.

Now I know what it feels like to

Lose a family member or be in real pain.

It is really hard.

Life seems to stop with the first tear.

You sense you can never love again.

The tears of our eyes have a big effect

On our lives.

Maybe 85 times of crying will kill me

And everyone because of so much sorrow we have.

Life cannot go on without one little tear being shed.

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Life rained its blows hard upon me,

Punch-drunk I did blindly grope.

With unseeing eyes I stumbled

Into a cage that has no hope.

Huddled there,broken and bleeding,

Battered bird on a hard-won shore,

I mistook its strong bars encircling

For arms that were safe,secure.

But as from my wounds I recovered,

With newly healed eyes I saw

That the place I thought was a haven

Was a cage with a bolted door.

Outside in the misty morning

A bird in a sky of blue

Sings sweetly its song to its lover,

Its joy in the morning new.

While I, in my gilded prison,

From these bars ever yearn to elope;

Remember the fresh taste of morning

From a cage that has no hope.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This poem was written quite some years ago when I was very unhappy....A situation that has since been remedied.

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Do I deserve to reap what I sow?

My dandylion crop of weeds

Undeserved wishes for pity

And love grown in sloth’s embrace

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The King's Lament or In the Comfort of a Demon

A king stood atop a hill
His crown rested on a calloused brow
There was a fierce battle here
Many of his men had spent their lives
To defend his right to rule
Those who would now rule themselves
He fell to his knees and wept
  "What pale demons have voice for me now?"
  "What devils can slay my will"
  "When I can kneel in my brother's blood"
  "And know that they died this day"
  "So that I could rule this rock"
  "Would that I had bled with them"
  "I could sleep within this blessed earth"
  "I could grasp the clay I rule"
  "And know that I am at last a king"
  "But my blade is warmed in sheath"
  "And not in my devil's corpse"

A being of ancient hate
Heard the king's lament from realms below
He cupped his hands to his mouth
And voiced his concern to the surface
  "Oh ruler of bone and flesh!"
  "Oh thou insect lamenter!"
  "Wouldst that I could turn back time"
  "So thou couldst view thy sheep dying well"
  "Whilst thou bravely watched from throne"
  "Knowing that thy blood could not be spilt!"
  "Oh Duke of sweet Cowardice!"
  "Oh thou gift-giver of souls!"
  "Do not send more I beg thee!"
  "My brethren and I have fed too much!"
  "Our bellies bulge with thy sons!"
  "They will take much time for us to pass."
  "Yet, do not fret soul-giver"
  "Thou hast many yet to give!"

A sorrow brimmed the king's heart
For though the demon's words stoked his rage
Their icy truth broke his will
And he knew that he was not a king
  "Do not rend my soul further!"
  "I accept my chains of fate!"
  "I drown myself in my fear!"
  "I need not your council for my shame!"
  "I need not a demon ear!"
  "You are a jewel on my dagger hilt"
  "My own strength will thrust it true"
  "You are ornamentation"
  "My shame has no room for you"
  "Go digest the souls of those I sent"
  "I have no means to send more"
  "Do relish them while you can, devil--"
  "For the sons of my realm die"
  "Under my rule nevermore"

The demon's laugh echoed far
It shook the ground beneath the king's feet
So strong was the devil's laugh
A fissure appeared that stank of Hell
  "Oh king who would not be king!"
  "Oh renouncer of the crown!"
  "I would beseech thee at least"
  "To run thyself upon thy cold steel"
  "Before thy crown leaves thy brow"
  "So we may drink the blood of a king"
  "Not the blood of a peasant"
  "Who gave up his throne of lies"
  "In pointless retribution"
  "For I have seen the roots of evil"
  "And they dwell in every man"
  "And in some they flourish, as in thee."
  "Why dons't thou join us brother?"
  "Show us the true ways of man!"

The king's eyes burned with fury
  "Do not judge me imp!  I have slain you!"
  "Every time my blade bit true,"
  "It cut away your infernal words!"
  "Every time I struck down lies,"
  "I butchered your soulless kind!"
  "Do not sow the seeds of shame"
  "In one who's reaped that crop all his days!"
At that the fissure spread wide
A gust of death and putrid decay
Engulfed and blinded the king
And when it cleared he looked up
The infernal one strode out
He was the incarnate of hatred
The embodiment of death
And he spread his arms wide for embrace
  "Oh cruel one with bitter words!"
  "Oh brave one with bloodless sword!"
  "I beg of thee to draw back"
  "These thorns of painful disavowment"
  "For I fear thou knows of naught"
  "But evil's sweet and christening touch"
The hell fiend ventured forward
To take his kin in his arms
The king, scowling, crossed his arms
  "Don't think me so easily broken"
  "You believe that I am done"
  "You see me as fruit ripe for the plucking"
His smile was slow, his gaze dark
  "Perhaps one day I will be"
His hand flew to hilt of sword
  "But by God it will not be today!"
His blade leapt from its scabbard
And with a roar rivaling Hell's depths
He moved to engage the imp
He'd not fail twice this day!

The imp shook his head in loss
Raising his claws he smote the king prone
Looking at the man, he smirked
  "I would hope thee more virile than this"
  "I'd think that a king of men"
  "Would be a strong sturdy type"
  "Yet here thou lies in the mud"
  "And here thou wallows in your son's blood"
  "I feel no need for battle"
  "With one so feebly endowed and frail"
He leered at the king and grinned
Knowing jibes hurt more than blows
Rising slowly to his feet
The king wiped the blood and mud from him
He raised his blade overhead
The evil one laughed in disbelief
  "Are thou unpossessed of wits?"
  "Does't thou yearn so for death?"

The demon moved from Hell's gates
And stood resting his fists on his hips
  "What will greet thee in the morn"
  "If I should fall by thy blade this eve?"
The king seethed, feeling hate
The imp smiled, being hate
  "It matters not if I live"
Replied the king swinging his blade high
  "As long as I die nobly"
He split the air with vicious circles
His heart pounding with fury
His mind racing with regret
He would win back what he'd lost
The prize would not lay with who would win
But in the attempt itself
  "If you die, at last I earn my crown."
  "If I die, it's with honor"
  "So meet me, reeking devil"
  "Your last blow found me wanting"
  "Your next, I vow, will be met tenfold"
  "By strength that once was weakness"
  "By a heart that was too much like yours"
  "But still my own to direct"
  "And my own it will remain!"
The imp at last seemed bothered
This was not a view that he condoned
He did not approve at all
  "Spare me thy holy drippings, weakling"
  "Release me from thy sermon"
Another great laugh issued forth
Throwing its head back in mirth
The king at last saw weakness emerge
He rushed forth, his blade a blur
To cleave the demon where head met neck
He could not know the outcome
No man had slain a demon

But his sword, it did bite true
And the devil's face, locked in surprise
Tilted on its foul moorings
Yet as the thing's lifeblood fully fled
It razored the king's chest open
Splitting his heart quite in two
The king's wound would see him fall
But not before the imp's head rolled off
And desecrated the ground
The shocked look still painted in rictus
The king leaned over and said
In a quieting whisper
  "Oh thou harlot of Satan"
  "Oh thou headless terror of the dirt"
  "The time has come to part ways"
  "I do not know if thine dead eyes saw"
  "But it seems thou met ground first"
  "Though I surely will follow"
  "A small part of me thanks you"
  "You relit a flame I'd long thought lost"
  "That flame dims as I now do"
  "But its glow was unmistakable"
  "Fare well, soulless slug of Hell"
  "I go now where no man rules"
As the king's life slipped away
He felt the earth open around him
The weight of his crown had gone
The blade, gripped tightly in old, strong hands
Faded from touch and was lost
But no loss was felt by he
No longer was he removed
No longer was he above his sons
No longer did he suffer
As brave men who fought with loyalty
Died without seeing their king
For now he was one of them

Many strong hands lifted him
And embraced him warmly and soundly
He knew not one of them, true
But they all knew and welcomed their own
One who had found his true path
And had lived and died... a king


Author's Notes/Comments: 

Ug, what a monster.  For those meter-maniacs out there, this rather epic poem rigidly adheres to a unique 7-9-7-9-7-7 meter, and then repeats itself.  

It may very well be as exhausting to read as it was to write, but if you make it through, tell me what you think.

Thanks everyone!

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Little Girl Lost

I walked in and ordered something to eat,

There she was with silver high heels on her feet.

She was sitting with a much,much older man,

Was he a relative or just a young girls fan.

She was 11 or maybe even younger,

In his eyes I could see his hunger.

He treated her to one kids happy meal,

Waiting for her innocence to steal.

She was making all the grown up moves,

He the devil complete with hooves.

He sat and made idle small talk,

When is was finished would he make her walk.

She was dressed just like some lady of the night,

To his eyes she was a real sexy sight.

I see this and my heart will bleed,

Thinking of words she would never heed.

She has no clue what is ahead,

This would be something she will dread.

She might become old before her time,

Why do men commit this sort of crime?

When something happens to her and it will,

Would he get off with some sort of deal?

To him she is just something to use,

If her family knew they would blow a fuse.

Will he take that much-dreaded fall?

Would he get a smooth lawyer with his one call?

Just wonder at night how he sleeps?

When at her funeral her family weeps.

She was just a little girl lost,

They had no idea what this would cost.

They wish of this they had known,

To her more love they would have shown.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

this is about a kid that I saw at McDonalds one day after work....

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A little lady bug landed on my finger

it made me wonder what to do.

Seeing as how she was so tiny

and fragile to it's true.

I took her in my small hand

and walked with her right outside.

Let her climb upon a little leaf

but a spider got her and she died.

So the next time that a lady bug

should come and land on my fingers.

I think I'll choose to let her stay

and see just how long she lingers.

I hear that it brings good luck

to the one that the lady bug should choose.

Now I feel so horrible at this death

I just have the lady bug blues.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

just a little thing that happened to me at work......

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Missing Poem

For my friends here on this site,

I wrote a poem of sorts,

Took a suggestion on the title,

My post poems delight.

Went in to make the change,

And now it is missing,

Oh where are you my sweet little poem,

This is really strange.

I hope that there is some way,

For me to find all the words again,

I hope that someone printed it out,

If you did then thanks is what i will say.

I miss those words of friendship so sweet,

I hope that they are not afraid,

To be out there some where alone,

To have them back would be so neat.

If back to this site you make it,

And back to my very on site page,

I will print you out and file you,

Or maybe frame you and on my desk you'll sit.

So I am on the look out for you,

And hope that i find you soon,

I just can't believe this happened,

You were so special i never knew.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

my heart is breaking.... and this is what is in my head

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