making changes

Navigating the Darkness

I examine others around me flourishing

Their lives blooming like a flower

I wander aimlessly through my own

Everything I touch wilts instantly

Each time I catastrophically halt my world

It becomes that much harder to bounce back

As I stand here today I have miles to make up

This nightmare is my reality unfortunately

All of which comes from my own hand

Blame can no longer be deflected to others

And I have to face the cold hard facts

I try to cling on to something positive in my life

But it's like I am swaying from a slippery ledge

As each day passes I lose a finger's grip

There was once a time when I held hope closely

But through the years optimism has moved beyond the horizon

I pray the Lord will fill me with vision and knowledge

While my life's flame flickers in the worlds gale force winds

The battle within me has spilled over into others lives

I pray if I search hard enough I can find a reason to change

And start a journey that I know to be terrifying

But ultimately ends on my own personal path of righteousness

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just a piece I wrote to get some stuff off my chest

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My World

Sometimes I wonder if the world could change from my existence,

and when opportunity comes knocking why I meet it with resistance,

I can see my future up ahead and its terrifying,

our lives often dictated from others verifying, but I tell you I swear I'm trying,

and the bullshit their trying to sale I ain't buying.

They want you to stay in line and start complying,

but my talents I ain't denying.

When life's kicking you around, and trying to pin you down,

never ever throw in that towel, you got strength you haven't found.

I never get a tan, I'm still deep underground,

set this world ablaze with my own unique sound.

I'm gonna lead by example, create my music no samples,

the truths hard to handle, and I know I can be a handful.

But stick it out with me and never look back,

I'll have fools stopping in their tracks the instant they hear my tracks.

Thank God my mind ain't distorted from the shit I was snorting,

and I'm walking around today thats what's really important.

I've been blessed with this vocabulary so extraordinary,

these others real ordinary so please don't compare me.

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Change

I wanna change. change this mind. sad to tears. smile to fake. always faking. always trying. no words to say. don't tell me it's okay. going through the motions. day by day. habit takes form. not even thinking. at least i'm still breathing. wake up. wake up. realize your here. stop the habit. stop the fear. no longer alone. no longer falling. stop going through the motions. wake up. you're home. be yourself. be alive. be free. be happy. live your life. stop being sad. just open your eyes. pull off the mask. you'll be fine. it's time to come out. be yourself. it's time to be happy. it's time to smile. no mask. no tears. lies turn to truth. the habit disappears.

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