heartbreak

Simply Forgotten

Can I please stop thinking of you?

Leave my thoughts,

And take my insecurities 

 

What you left in your wake,

As you simply disappeared

 

No words

Nothing

I'm just left to wonder why

 

Fuck this inner ache

Fuck this forever pain

 

I wish you'd come back

Swoop me up

And tell me this is all a joke 

 

I wish I could hold you

Lay on you, or

You could lay on me

 

What did we even have?

Did any of it have meaning?

 

Here I am again

Rambling 

 

Fuck you for hurting me

Fuck you for the gut punch to my heart

 

Thank you for ruining a piece of me

As you remain silent

And I am simply forgotten

Author's Notes/Comments: 

3/23/2018

View takemewithy0u's Full Portfolio

Siren From The Depths

Seeing behind your disguise

Facing the truth

Of the evil man you are

Of the turmoil you've caused

 

Your hands around my throat

Asphyxiation

My eyes pop open wide

Fingers feeling numb

 

Justice will be met

No longer are you free

Today is the day

Of judging your character

 

Sail away from your problems

Feel you owe me nothing 

Sense a bit of freedom

But always let a thought linger

 

Of the woman

Half fish

Who never stole your heart

But did steal your soul

 

For I am nothing

But powerful

As I lure you in

With a song

 

Hold onto the bow

But it won't save you 

Your final calling

Unreleased to freedom

Author's Notes/Comments: 

3/23/2018

View takemewithy0u's Full Portfolio

Release Me

 

I have wasted

My time

My energy

My breath on you

 

I have gotten

Nothing

Emptiness

Loneliness from you

 

You have fooled me

Put a veil over my eyes

Tricked me

Into loving you

 

You have taken, everything

My heart

My body

My mind from me

 

Yet

I love you 

I crave you

I yearn for you

 

Where is there reason,

When love is involved?

Where is reality,

When emotions run wild?

 

I would ask

But there is no answer

You leave me in silence

To stand on my own

I long to crumble

Fall into pieces

Cry to the heavens

Cry out to you

 

Never will you be

Mine own heart

Mine own soul

Or any part

Of mine own being

 

So… let me go

Set me free

Open your palms

And release me

 

Please...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

3/14/2018

View takemewithy0u's Full Portfolio

Forever

Folder: 
Heart Break

If absence makes the heart grow fonder, 

Then I'll wait for you just a bit longer...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Only if they're willing to wait for you too...

Time Hurts

Folder: 
Heart Break

Wanting time to go slowly, But it always flies by.
Now it trudgingly drags on without you by my side.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Learn to cherish

View hailey753216's Full Portfolio

From drunken ashes….

From drunken ashes….

By jfarrell

 

You’ve seen the harry potter scene…

The phoenix burns to ashes…

Then reappears two minutes later…

Egg, to little bird thing, to renewed phoenix

 

I was a drunk…. august, this year, I was still a drunk…

I AM a drunk… and proud of it….

My dad drunk and beat up his family…

I drank, went to sleep, wake up, drink…

 

Rinse and repeat…

 

Today…

3 women kissed me on both cheeks….

Everyone I work with patting me on the back,

Shaking my hand….

 

“Thanks, Jim”

 

Most I felt valued, alive,

…... like, ever…

And I haven’t got a scooby doo why.

….. not that it isn’t all nice…

 

Since I returned to work,

I faced a lot of my worst fears….

Heights - serving champange 25th floor of building…

London at night, all lights, forever…

 

Never seen London look so beautiful…

 

Crowds - being stuck on Olympic Way….

From station to work takes 5 minutes…

After work….

Hugging the wall, and kissing, very lovingly, every lampost….

 

THERE’S NO WAY OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

After work….

50, 000 people and a little extra…

All headed for the same station….

…. trust me, I really love those lamposts….

 

An anchor…

In this OCEAN of people….

Anchor…

What word could be more appropriate?

 

SPACE….

To roll a smoke, to dance a jig….

To plug in my headphones and LEAVE EARTH>>>>>

A space, chance, to breathe

 

And…

So many beautiful women, everywhere…

20 years, locked in my flat, alone, celibate….

There IS a very good reason I chose that.

 

I’m too scared to be a phoenix.

I’ve seen my future,

Alone,

Forever and ever.

 

Please don’t drag me from my ashes;

Let me smoulder…. burn…

“a taste of honey is worse than none at all” - great song…

I don’t want no part.

 

Fears - LOVE - vulnerable, pain, hurt, heartbreak….

I don’t want no part, too scared to…

Let me lie in my ashes

And never rises again

 

please

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

someone once asked me.... you're like a kid in a sweetshop, around women.....

not quite, i replied.... yes, kid in a sweet shop.... but aall the mars bars are empty wrrappers.....

my therapist didn't understand,

 

i just never want to have that conversation again

 

 

Young and Dumb

Folder: 
Voice

Back when I was young and dumb

I opened up my heart 

Exposing my imperfections 

And all my flaws

To him, the boy that I loved

My first love

The one that had my heart

My world was a fairy tale

My Prince charming by my side 

So understanding and thoughtful

My blessing from above 

But he never understood my value

I was never enough for him

He thought the grass was greener on the other side

Maybe he was right

 
View dewdrop's Full Portfolio

Control.

Trust.

It was a given, though you should have earned it.

A mistake I keep repeating;

As if I am not learning shit.

 

Every.

Single.

Experience.

Now, deemed worthless.

But you tell me how I feel.

You can tell me if this is real.

Did I make this mess?

 

"Selfish".

Ridiculous, spitting words like this is a spelling test.

"Emotional".

Memento mori, you turned your back on me.

I'm a human fucking being.

Excuse me for grieving, the death of myself.

 

Banging on a cardboard coffin.

Hands bloodied, dont feel the hurt.

Don't think of all the dirt gettin in;

Make it up up to the surface,

don't let them win.

 

I can feel the grass and tug at it rough.

Crawling out, organs a mess.

"Not today, Satan"

I tell myself in a huff.

Tired of going through things.

I've seen enough.

 

Trying to avoid hurt.

Licking my wounds.

Not self consumed.

Begining to breathe now.

It's like I've forgotten how.

Throat full of earth, I throw it up.

Dust off my dress, 

Memories of being alive with cough syrup.

Walking dead at this point,

barely breathing.

 

Simply trying to heal.

The coffin I left behind is real.

With a piece of myself in there.

"There lies a piece of Betty"

No one cares.

"A tenacious woman that always cared"

 

Now I'm up here.

Human being amongst people.

Fucking.

Scared.

Too tenacious to die, too emotional to be alive.

Simply trying to deal;

With things I should have never felt.

 

These are just the cards,

that I have been dealt.

One cannot control that,

But how they handle their hand.

 

I cannot control what life hands me,

but I can take a stand.

 

I refuse to me told how I feel,

My emotions are valid.

I am real.

I've got balls of steel;

They are just misplaced.

I am not something to be forgotten,

Something you can simply replace.

 

You mistreat me, or try to break me down.

I go Casper.

You don't find me anywhere in town.

I'm a woman, I deserve respect.

But, I get treated like a Leper.

A damn reject.

 

This mental illness is at the steering wheel.

I get barked at for this so much, I can no longer feel.

You want to control me?

Take a number.

You can't even handle me.

 

 

 

The poem that shouldn't be written

Folder: 
2017

I always do this to myself.

I think it’s okay to rip off the band aid.

And I end up bleeding

All over again.

 

I think the wound has healed.

But eventually, I always

Tear it open again.

Leaving another hole in me.

 

It seems like we could pick up

Where we left off

Like nothing has changed.

And I could find home in you again.

 

I could easily fall back in love with you

Who says I’m not still.

Part of me wishes I would.

We could be as great if not better than before.

 

Your house still smells the same.

It brought back a lot of memories.

I didn’t realize how much

I missed my second home.

 

I know you feel the same.

I know you hope that

We could pick up where we left off.

You hope that we could make up lost time.

 

I wish I could still be part of your life.

I don’t want you to kiss other people.

I don’t want you to fall for someone else.

But I don’t want to be that girl.

 

I don’t want to keep you from being happy

I just wish I could be part of it.

I can’t be selfish.

I hope you can move on.

 

I can’t go back

Even if part of me wants to.

I know I made the right choice

Even though sometimes it feels wrong.

 

This time I need to let the wound heal,

And not reopen it.

I know it’ll leave a scar.

And when I look at it,

I’ll think of you.

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 6/4/17