Why am I not good enough?
What did I do wrong?
Why am I not good enough?
Why must I be alone for so damned long?
Why am I not good enough?
Why am I not worth enough to try?
Why am I not good enough?
My wings will never fly.
Why am I not good enough?
What harm did I ever do to you?
Why am I not good enough?
Why must my dreams be so few?
Why am I not good enough?
Why must I do all this crying?
Why am I not good enough,
To do anything but slowly dying?
I'm being dragged bare against the road with no set destination
I didn't know love would feel like a morbid amputation
Running through my mind and yet no set estimation
Looking for salvation, but forever ending with sensation
I held my world up like you lit up the sky, you were my sun
To make me feel alive for once? You were the only one
Now the sun sets again, but the fright has just begun
I wait the day you rise again, I can't think it's said and done
One day, I know, you will not come back
For good, they say, I'd think I'd have a heart attack
With you I feel alive, but without the visions pitch black
You make me who I am, but you make me what I lack
But they say I think I feel isn't true
But when I saw you, I knew
You held me up like glue
and I knew right there, that I couldn't live without you
I'll give you all the time you need and wait
To years to decades, for me its never too late
Even if I'm old, and almost by life's gate
To die together is my wish, to be a perfect fate
And so I love you with my being, and all my heart
Despite any other who can set us apart
I know from the end, and to the start
For this love is more than that, a beautiful beautiful art.
I feel quit lonely here, about to burst in to tears. I can't imagine how my heart really feels, but I know I feel tired of the lies everyone tells me. I think my heart is hurt by all the pain I hold inside me. I feel like screaming till my voice is gone completely, like crying and never stopping just how rain happens, like running after something that's not really there but I keep going because I'm so confused of everything that's going on. I wanna say I'm sorry but why should I, if I'm not the one hurting anybody, I'm the one getting hurt but I still hold it in till I can't no more and then explode of all the pain, jealousy, anger, madness, and love, the one thing I fear most sometimes. I try being someone else because I wanna forget who I am, I wanna be someone who no one lies to and never leaves me waiting. I wanna be that girl who everyone loves, just like everyone loves the Fresh air of the beach when there walking in the sand with their love ones. But I will always stay stuck here wanting everyone to stop lying to me and tell me truth about how they feel. There's only one thing in life I want the most and that's to love the ones that are there for me and have never lied and to succeed in life with the goals I have in mind. I feel quit lonely here about to burst in tears.
I'm stuck inside myself.
Attacked by all my feelings,
attacked by all my pain.
I'm stuck inside my head,
and I'm dead to the world.
Everyone around me is living,
they seem truly happy,
they go out and do things.
And then there's me...
I'm the girl who throws
out small smiles,
ones that aren't like my real ones,
and yet people still fall for them.
I smile and act like everything
is a-okay when I'm around others,
But once I'm alone-
the smile drops away,
the laughter dies.
The tears come,
the pain hits,
and I slowly sink
down onto the floor.
I'm dead to the world.
I'm not living anymore.
Dead to the World
Let me lie
Let me freeze again
Till death do we part
And we are on a fast road there
Let me die
Let me live
For death is only the beginning
And I will rise again
I am bound again, just as they said I was
It's clear and beautiful blue hue becomes forever cloudy
A bird's chirps become distorted by the rain and thunder's cries
I walk alone the path of the river
Alone accompanied by my footprints only
Till the crow comes to bring yet another question
This I can't ignore, for the world will shiver
And the steam shall arise from my next decision
and the never's and forever's again will pour the air
I hope to hold on to whatever is left
The sun can tell another day, to become my true vision
I had built a wall up,
up around my heart.
I had protected my heart,
until you showed up
in my life.
I let my guard down,
exposing my wall to you.
I fell hard and
I fell fast for you.
Instead of taking care
of my heart and wall,
you decided to do otherwise.
You broke my wall down,
causing my heart to
be crushed and broken.
I gave you access
to my heart
and you broke me.
and he will leave me alone tonight
Again within my darkness, my question and fright
and again, again my emotions are denied
And again I pretend to be okay, when a heart is fried
I'd like to know just one thing
Will there ever be an answer to bring?
Night by night, without a knock on my door
Tears so frozen, still thoughts bringing me so sore
I embrace my shadows and what I have been ripped from
I try to look up to the sky, and yet there's still no sight of a visible sun
Your lies cloud the beauty from what I could see
Your lies take away from what I thought could be
and it's all so obvious, yet my boredom chooses to hold me up so
To the still of chained emotions, trying to grasp the shadows made of woe
and again, I still do not know why
When my only entertainment is looking forward to another lie..
With your words draped in sweet clever disguises
Lead me only to questions and silent demises
You again speak of love so freely
But I can tell by your eyes you don't hold it dearly
and I'll wait intently again for more words to keep me company
So I can cling to something, someone, but instead I look forward to agony
It's something I don't quite understand
but it's the closest I have to someone else's hand
and he will leave me alone for another night
Still without another explanation, I cling to an empty sight
I found a girl, and saw her perspective
Silent, yet surprisingly reflective
They claimed she was away, entirely defective
But I knew otherwise just from the look in her eyes
I saw through the silent, and closed off disguise
And from there, I saw the immediate connection
Completely dissected, but still searches for true affection
Her warm, yet crooked emotion
A calmed, yet broken devotion
Silent, but struggling for her sound
and yet, still not a face found
Her skin torn, gone and rotten.
Her mouth stolen, words lost, ignored and forgotten.
She was exposed to all of the morbid things
Corrupted lies, and uneven broken wings
All she wanted to know if happiness was true
This is what I saw, this was the girl I knew
And she left sudden, without a word,
Her existence she seen was too blurred
Before I could realize, she was gone and done
Did you ever wonder what life can become?
All she wanted to know if happiness was true
This is what I saw, this was the girl I knew..