Alive

Monsters In The Dark

Now listen to what I have to say

For the wicked hide in the shadows of this day

 

You know nothing of what is of me

You may know the color of my eyes

But not of what they are capable to see

 

Now here, I've warned this upon you

For not every smile is ever true

 

Everything is not set in stone

You may say there is an answer

When nothing is completely known

 

Close your eyes, please understand

That what you may rely on is a blood-thirsty hand

 

Unknown of what they truly are

Watch think before you turn and talk

Someone so close to you can be so far

 

So remember before you go on and say

"But why would anyone do this to me anyway?"

 

Human nature can be full of evil and greed

Unwatched, A monster born within the shadows, full only of self pleasure and need.

Feelings Hurt

You are so sweet and so sensitive. Your express such deep pain with your words. If I were to see you in front of me now, I would give the biggest hug, and let you cry the hugest crocadile tears ever cried to let you know it is so right for you to express your feelings of whatever they may be.   Life can be a beautiful and easy living experience, or it can be difficult , dramatic, and full of ups and downs. I have lived both. My choices today are based upon the scales within me that weigh the huge sides of the chasm that separates my joys and my pains, and I am the only judge of that.. That chasm is different for everyone and there is no "book of rules" as to what is "fair" and what is not. We have to decide for ourselves. Our society has tried to create "laws" to bring some possibility of "normalcy" as to what is "acceptable" and what is "unacceptable"...unsuccessfully. The most that they seem to be able to do, is make the chasm smaller and smaller, until one day,the chasm may be so small, that perhaps even these very words of truth will be considered "abusive".   


So the important part in this is to forgive. Forgive the person, but most of all forgive yourself for allowing yourself to think that loving another person means that you will get the results you want. The difficult part about loving as a human being is that there is no guarantee...ever...that the people you love will love you back in he same way you love them. And when you find the one that is right for you, your reward will always be in the loving itself, and not in what you expect in return. That is what love is. Love is in the loving. Love is in "being" love itself. It is it's own reward, and the rewards are felt and seen by you in your own capacity to love more and more as each hurdle you fly over passes and new ones appear in your life journey.     


There are so many people who have brought such wonderful joy into my life. Many times, those same people have brought unbearable pain. It took me many years to accept that this is just the way we are as human beings. We will not always get along, we will have moments of joy, betrayal, mediocrity, (sometimes not such a bad thing considering the price paid when one lives as a thrill seeker, just my opinion), and great heartache. Don't let anyone place limits on how good or bad your life will be. YOU are the only one who has the right to do that, and I hope you learn where they are for you, but love will never change for you. It is unconditional, and YOU, are loved by the universe..."unconditionally".    I wish you peace and healing. Hugs. ♥










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What Can I Say

Its Time To Rise,
But I've Fallen Down
Will You Help Me, Lend Me a Hand
Will You Pick Me Up, And Care For Me

Cause I've Lost Sight Of The Light
I'm Starting To Fall Into Pieces
Cause There Are Times
I Wanna Give Up
Cause There Are Times
I Just Don't Want To Try Anymore

 

But The Grace You've Given
Is Far Beyond What I Can Comprehend
Our Tears Fall Out Of Cries
But What Can I Say When I Need You
There's None Like You

 

Into The Darkness I Fall
But When I Fall
I Rise Up With Greater Strength
Here I Start To Doubt
But When I Hit The Ground
I Know I Won't Break
Because Of What You've Made Me
Stronger Than My Actions

 

You've Turned These Ashes
Into Sparkles Of Color And Sparkles Of Light
Thanks For Caring About Me, When I Was Selfish
Thanks For Healing Me, When I Was Hurting Myself
Oh What Can I Say To Give My Thankfulness
What Can I Do To Give You Praise
To Kneel Down On My Knees
And Praise The Lord For All That He Has Done

Sparkling Light

Folder: 
People

I Don't Know What It Is
But There's Something About You
That's Beyond Words Of Amazing
I'm Sitting Here Thinking About You
You Don't Know How Much I Love You

 

Because It Hit Me Like A Wall
You Surprised Me
It Was Overwhelming
I Saw You With A Bright Smile
You Caught My Eye
I Don't Know Why
But I Can't Explain Otherwise

 

But In A Few Moments
I'm Here With You
My Doubts Fade Away
Because When I'm Holding You
It All Starts To Make Sense
I'm Thinking Will You Be With Me Forever
And Of Course Instantly It Becomes Crystal Clear
Destined Love Known To My Heart

 

Let Me Brush Up Against You
Let Me Hold Your Hand Beside Me
Let Us Sit Below The Stars Tonight
Let's Enjoy This Beautiful Starry Night
To Have Time To Bond With The Love Of My Life

 

My Love Is Burning With Intense Passion
With You Standing Right In Front Of Me
Close Enough To Hold Your Hands
I Blush Bright Like A Tomato
Not Because You Make Me Smile
But Because I'm In Love With You
And I Love You More Than Words
Could Ever Possibly Say Any Day

Glitters Are Passing By

Folder: 
People

Sparks Fly And I'm Trying To Hide
Because There's Someone I Love
No It's Not Just A Feeling
But An Excitement Of Pleasure
Someone Who Sparks Up Your Face
Somebody Who Makes You Smile

 

He Doesn't Just Say You're Beautiful
He Actually Means Every Word
He Makes Your Face Blush Up
He Makes You Feel Comfortable Being Yourself

 

If I Could Have You In My Arms
I Would Hold You So Close
If I Could Have You With Me
I Would Snuggle You Right Up To Me

 

It May Be Raining Outside
But Let's Make The Best Of This Moment
When I'm Snuggling With You
I Feel Like I'm In Love, No
I Am In Love With You
I Can't Shake Off This Feeling
Because It's Real And I Love You
More Than Words Could Possibly Show

 

You Came Into My Life
And You Made Everything
Way Better Than It Is
I May Never See You
But I Pray I Will See You
Maybe Sometime In My Life

 

I Swear I'd Do Anything To Have You
Distance May Separate Us In Life
But I Would Die To Be With You
Maybe It's All Wish Thinking
But I'd To See Your Face
I'd Like To Be With You
If God Determines Us To Be Together
My Lovely Skyler...

Holding Back Love

Folder: 
People

That Girl Is Like
A Thrilling Beautiful Silver Mermaid
You Don't Know If Mermaids Are True
But If You've Seen Someone So Beautiful
How Would You Describe Them?

 

Perhaps She Is A Very Kind And Caring Woman
Or She May Be Cheerful And Affectionate Lady
Maybe She Has A Specific Type Of Personality
That Just Thrills Beyond Your Expectations

 

Someone You Just Adore And Love
That One Of A Kind Woman You Dream Of
May It Be Very Unique Or A Compassionate Kind Hearted Girl
Someone You Might Have Known For A Long Time
That You Just Haven't Gotten To Know Enough About Them

 

Maybe If You Take That One Step
Maybe You Could Get To Know Them
A Little Bit More Than You Wanted
More Than You Wanted,
More Than You Could Ever Wanted....

 

I Don't Know, But I May Be Falling For You
Because I'm Hiding What I'm Feeling Here
But I'm Tired Of Holding This Inside My Head
Maybe I'm Falling For You...
Might Be Falling For You...

 

No One Is Around Us
We're Here At The Beach
I'm Scared Of What You May Think
The Sun Is Shining So Bright
It Brightens Your Face
More Radiantly Then Ever
I Don't Know What To Do
But I Think I'm Falling For You
I'm Falling For You...

 

My Heart Keeps Racing
Emotions Keep Spinning Around And Around
I Spend All My Time Thinking About You
I Can't Stop Thinking About It
Because I Know I'm Falling For You...

Remember To Just Forget About It

There's Only So Many Days We Can Live
And So Many Days To Forget What Made Us Hurt
But We're Stuck At Where Were At
I Just Wanna Lay Back
Break Down Crying In Tears
Because I Don't Want To Go Back

 

As We Think Back Into The
All I Remember Is The Hurt
Because I've Forgotten The Lessons
I Don't Remember The Happy Moments
I Don't Think There Were Any Signifigant Moments
But I Don't Know If I Can Move On

 

Yea I Don't Try To Remember
But It Keeps Bouncing Back And Forth
I Tried To Erase It
And I Smashed The Delete Button
But It Keeps Refreshing In And Out

 

Nobody Tries To Be Perfect
But I'm Trying To Break Away From My Mind
Things That Are Clogged In My Mind
I Just Want To Float Away
Into A Far Away Place

 

Sometimes I Just Want To Fly Away
Sit Close At The Ocean's Bay
Lay In The Soft Bright Sand
And Feel The Warmth Of The Sun
And Forget About Everything I Just Said

Bleeding Scars Of Crying Guilt

Ever Feel Like You're The Bad One?
The One Who Caused Trouble
Have You Ever Felt Like You Were The One To Blame?
The One Who Caused Your Own Pain
There Was No One Else Who Could Have Done It

 

You Are The One Who Causes Your Own Pain
You Are The One Who Caused Your Own Suffering
But Who Could Have Helped You
Through This Struggling Phase Of Life
You Were All Alone
There Was No One Else In Sight
How Could You Have Known How To Prevent It

 

Nobody Told You How To Live Your Life
But Nobody Told You What You Were Doing Wrong
All You Knew Was The Faults You've Done
The Hurt And The Blame You Caused On Yourself
What Could You Have Done
What In The World Could You Have Done

 

I Can Only Ask For Forgiveness
I'm Sorry For The Wrongs I've Done
These Hands That Cause Trouble
Causing Mischief And Crimes
What Can I Do To Loosen This Guilt

 

I Can't Seem To Shake Off This Binding
All I Can Do Is Cry For All The Shame I've Done
I Know I Don't Deserve This Much Mercy
I Really Don't Deserve Friends
Because I'm Not Always There For Them
I Don't Feel I Deserve These Talents
Because Since I'm Not Using Them
I Feel Like They're Going To Waste

 

Why Am I Still Alive I Don't Know Why
I Really Should Not Be Here
I Do Not Give Any Benefit To Anyone
I Don't Even Work Right Now
I Can't Even Help Myself
Why Do I Still Receive Such Blessings
I Do Not Feel Important
I Do Not Feel I Am Needed Here

 

Have I Done Something Wrong
Will I Be Told What I Could Do Better
I Don't Know What I'm Thinking
I'm Crying My Eyes Out Right Now
I Can't Seem To Feel Better

 

I Don't Have A Shoulder To Lean On
I Feel So Lonely In This World
I Reach My Hand To You
But I Don't See You
I Place My Hand Over My Chest
But I Don't Feel Your Presence Over Me
Should I Really Fall In Life
Can I Make It Through This Time
I'm No Better Than Dirt

 

I Know I Am Loved
And I Continue To Tell Myself That
But I Feel Like My Bones Ache Too Hard
I'm Surely To Fall This Time
Surely To Fall Down This Time
Am I Really Worth That Much...

Untying Knots

There's Something About
When You're In Love With Someone
You Enjoy Being With Them
Being In Their Presence
And You Love Them To Heart

 

Although Sometimes That Feeling
When You're With Them
May Drag You Down
Perhaps Their Dream Is Something Big
And When You're With Them
Maybe It Won't Happen

 

For The Though Of You Being In The Way
Of Having Them Making Their Dream Come True
Saddens Your Heart And Body
Your Mind Turns Sluggish And Slow
Because You Know You're Just Dragging Them Down

 

Whats Best Is That You Shouldn't Be With Them
But Sometimes Breaking Up Isn't The Easiest
Perhaps It Wasn't Meant To Be
Although You Think It Wasn't Meant To End Like That
So You Begin To Doubt Yourself And Wonder Otherwise

 

Your Eyes Being To Wane In Strength
You Want To Be With Them
And They Want To Be With You
But Something Doesn't Feel Right

 

Because You Know
That Something Needs To Break Away
Close Paths And Stray Different Places
Because When Ties Knot Roads.
One Or The Other May Not Move Forward
And It Just Creates A Road Block

 

So With Hearts Hurt
And Bodies Tired
The Knot That Was Created
Needs To Be Loosened Up
So That You May Move Forward In Life