I loved you then


When you looked in my eyes,

the first time you said "I love you",

I loved you then.

When we walked the halls,

skipping class, just talking,

I loved you then.

When I had to go away,

when I needed help,

you were there, calling each day,

and I loved you then.

When I was on suicide watch,

alone and lost,

I loved you then.

When I had to move,

you came too, switched schools,

just so we could be together,

I loved you even more then.

When I saw you cry,

when you kissed my scars,

I loved you then.

When we walked in the rain,

your hand in mine,

I loved you then.

I went to church, tried to find salvation,

and even though you were uncomfortable,

you were there for me,

I loved you so much then.

When we broke up,

I saw the pain in your eyes,

you don't know it,

but I still loved you then.

Even though I hurt you,

you still cared about me,

and I loved you then.

When I moved again,

called every once in a while,

I never told you,

but I loved you then.

When I came back,

you came to visit me,

I hid it from you,

but I loved you then.

Endless conversations,

through heated arguements,

I loved you then.

Your careless, apathetic attitude,

the coldness in your voice,

to see the emptiness in your eyes bothered me.

I longed to hold you,

to say I loved you even then.

When everything was falling apart,

I reached out to you,

you helped me to stand.

When I talk to you,

I hear the concern in your voice.

I can never find the words,

but I love you now,

even more than I did then.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Calvin and I have been through a lot and this poem only touches on about half. But I wrote it to let him know I loved him for everything he's ever done for me and to thank him for being there for me even now.

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