Wash it all away

Folder: 
Rape

He violated me once,
took my innocence.

He ripped my very life from me,
when he took me in his arms,
when he raped me.

Shh, don't make a sound, he told me,
no one can hear you anyway.

She sits there, crying,
she knew what was happening to me,
she did nothing to make it stop.

Frozen, she could only watch,
should have helped me,
should have cried for help.

Shh, don't say anything he said,
his threat rang in my ears,
and we both obeyed, said nothing.

My mind rejected that reality,
made it into only a dream.

5 years later, it was no dream,
he took my innocence,
left me broken and scarred.

I look in the mirror,
I am so twisted,
why would anyone love me?

I scream and cry,
he violated me, he killed me on the inside.

Wake from another nightmare,
and my mind is still blank to me,
blocking out those images,
images I can't handle.

I cut my arms,
try to bleed my pain out,
but nothing helps,
nothing works.

I sit here in a scalding shower,
let it drown me,
let it wash all the filth away from me.

All I want is to be free,
to let the scars heal.

All I want is to walk in the rain,
to feel it's drops on my face,
kissing the tears that are falling,
carressing my cheeks.

Let the rain fall on me,
let it wash my past away.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A very dark part of my past that my mind refused to accept for many years, bit by bit the memories came back, the nightmares always haunt me

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