Footnote: Memorial Day Eve, 1981

As the waitress served

our table, you declared your

lesbian choice; out!

The pizza, largest size there,

remained---paid for, uneaten.

 

Kyakuchuu

Author's Notes/Comments: 

The potential for misunderstanding calls for additional explanation.  On Memorial Day weekend, she called me, quite unexpectedly, to say that she would be home from college for the weekend; and that she wanted to go out to pizza.  I believed that this was a date, and that the renewal of our relationship---which had been prompted a month before by her sister---was about to become serious.  In a most festive mood, I ordered the largest and most elaborate pizza available.  As it was delivered to the table, she declared---to me, and in the presence of the waitress---that she was "exploring her identity as a lesbian," and had not the least interest in more, from me, that ordinary friendship.  I do not judge her choice; although she abandoned the lifestyle when she received a better offer, eighteen months later.  But I think she could have chosen another way to present it. 

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Stephen's picture

Question?

Before her declaration, did she first say, "This is not about you. This is about me?" Women always said this to me when they were moving on,

Starward's picture

I think so, but I cannot say

I think so, but I cannot say for sure as the shock of her announcement (and you should have seen the waitress's face . . . this was in 1981) kind of blanked out everything that happened before.  (For example, I cannot remember getting ready, that night, to pick her up; and what I did immediately after we parted is also a blur.)  

 

She is now a very conservative Christian with a husband and a child.  Some fifteen years ago, when her father passed, i located her email and, with her husband's permission, sent my condolences.  I received a fairly detailed apology, shedding a lot of light on what really happened at Wittenberg in 1978.  No mention was made of her experimental interlude in 1981.


Starward.