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THE PROPOSAL TO TIGER
The times that we have spent together are beyond anything I imagined or wished to imagine. It is like even when you're not here you're here. I can feel your presence.
In doing all this research on marriage and relationships I have had to open myself up and take a look at my own life and relationships to include ours. I will be honest and say that for many years I thought of marriage as an institution and I never wanted to be institutionalized. My friends even went as far as calling me a diamond dodger. Yet I met you and you are so real that I love you for not just being good on paper but just being true real. You know where I'm coming from and love me for the being that I am spiritual and all. You accept me and I accept you and to me that is so wonderful that mere words cannot express that. I have been involved in other relationships where I was miserable being accused of being unfaithful if I wasn't back from work with in five minutes after I left, attacked physically , mentally and emotionally, but you. You not only opened me to love and what it can truly be , but in trusting that not all people act a certain way, and that a real butch is a real butch no matter what people think of her. You are someone who looks into my soul and taking my hand as you already have my heart whisper to me let us take this leap of faith together. I've never said this to anyone before but. "Thank you for giving me a place for my heart to come home to." That is truly my favorite definition of loving and being in love. I want to share so much with you. In doing this research there were many exercises and things that caught my attention so I'd thought I'd share them with you. Here are my laundry lists for love and life:
Love-
?Holding hands
?In House Date Nights
?Flowers (white daisies and honeysuckle) just because
?Cuddling and being cuddled to
?Giving and getting massages
?Giving Reiki treatments
?Kissing, touching, making love anywhere and everywhere
?Day and/or weekend trips (drives in the country, camping , hiking)
?Once or every 3 months shopping trip to Bath & Body Works or Victoria's Secret
?Hot chocolate, fire place or lemonade, porch
?Children, growing old together
Life-
?Love
?Marriage
?Children
?House/Home
?Published/successful author
?Singing, dancing, theatre (locally, community activities)
?Take a few classes in creative writing and music
Honey I am not rich by any means, but with you and our love I count myself rich beyond measure. I give you my heart. The one thing that the book I was reading kept pounding into my head was that marriage is a divine intervention for the acceptance of a lifelong covenant. I also found out that the #1 problem in marriage is selfishness. Here's a copy of the puppy vs. mature love stats:
Puppy-
?Focuses on receiving
?Impatient, self-centered
?Tends to outbursts of anger
?Self-protective, because it insists on meeting its meeting its needs above all.
Mature-
?Seeks to give to the other person
?Patient in spite of other's flaws
?Responds gently and appropriately to irritants
?Transparent and vulnerable
Here are some more, they are the contrast between a marriage covenant and a contract.
Covenant-
?Based on love
?Based on law
?Assumes Relationship "till death do us part"
?"what's mine is yours"
?" Your interests are my interests"
?Prepares for life together
Contract-
?Motivated by commitment
?Motivated by compulsion
?Prepares for marriage to fail
?Protects what is "mine"
?Secures "my" interests
?Prepares for life apart
It is quite amazing that I consider myself a very intimate being yet I never enjoyed such strong intimacy as with you. Love making is not just an act like having sex, but an intimate ritual of sharing that closeness with you. I just finished reading the "thou shalt flee sexual temptation online or otherwise". It states that if you are married or involved in a serious relationship that phone and cybersex are considered cheating if it is not with your mate. Of course it also goes on to say that same sex relationships are a sin when I personally believe that sexuality is fluid.
However they did have some good questions at the end of the chapter that got my attention.
1. Write your definition of sex
2. What grade would you give the intimacy (sexual, emotional, and spiritual) in your marriage? What is the one thing you and your mate can do to improve your grade?
3. Is your marriage/relationship built on rock or sand? Explain
Here's another stat:
Mature Love Is?
?Patient. I put up with the imperfections of my mate.
?Kind. I perform acts of kindness for the other person.
?Joyful With Truth. My love grows out of a base of honesty and integrity.
?Trusting. I believe in the best for my spouse.
?Full of Hope. I hope for the best from and for my mate.
?Enduring. My love lasts though even the toughest of times.
Most of All!!!
?Love Never Fails. I'm always there to support my spouse.
All that information and wealth of knowledge and I just want to say first and foremost that I love you. I opened my heart to you so easily and so openly because for the first time in my life I actually started listening to that little voice that said this is good or this is bad. Although it sounds corny and cheesy yes you had me at hello. I know that I may have to give up my femme card and possibly my southern debutant card in what I'm about to say but it has taken me so long to find you the one person who knows everything about me from the things that happened in the army to my current life and I don't want to even risk a chance at losing you so here goes. I love you more than words can say and I have never done this before especially via email or any other way but you are what I have looked for my whole life. You are the one butch, the one person who is my everything, someone I look forward to being a dolly domestic to, someone I want to grow old with, someone whom I share a soul with and we compliment each other.Someone who I want to do the house wife thing and raise children with. If I had a ring to give you I would and although I'm sure it goes against some femme rule if I was there right now I would look into your beautiful blue eyes with tears of joy in my brown eyes as I got on one knee and asked? Will you marry me? Will you allow me to be your wife, your domestic partner for the rest of our lives? The only thing I can give you right now is my heart and my love. I love you so much.
