#dad

LIKE HIM

He didn’t have fame or fortune.

He wasn’t interested in the climb.

He was always going on and on about love

and he was happy...all the time.

 

When it came my turn to say goodbye

I was angry.

I was sad.

I rested my head upon his chest...

for love was all I had.

 

“I wish I had more to offer you,” I said,

“before you go away,

something more that I can give you

something more that I can say.”

 

With what little strength he had left

he took my hand in his.

“You’ve given me love and not only is that important,” he said,

“It’s the only thing that is.”

 

I used to wish for fame and fortune

but that was just a whim.

Now I wish for a life filled with love...

and to be happy...

just like him.

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THE MASTERS AND MY DAD

 

 

When we add a memory to our life…of a special moment…a special day…how can we ensure that memory will live on…that it will not fade away?

 

I imagine it’s the nature of memories that some will bubble to the surface…never to dim or fade…triggered by a photo…an aroma……a word…that awakens the moment that memory was made.

 

While other memories we nurture every chance we get…of a moment…a day…a time…we never want to forget.

 

My dad and I were never close…although the bonds between us were never broken…it’s just any love we ever shared was usually unspoken.

 

My dad loved to watch sports, however, and one day on a whim…I sat down to watch the final round of the Masters tournament with him.

 

As was customary we watched in silence…golf balls flying through the air…but I was filled with this feeling of comfort knowing he was sitting over there.

 

As I said it was something we didn’t talk about…something we’d never ever exclaim…but I like to think when Dad looked over at me…he was feeling just the same.

 

That became our yearly ritual…no matter what plans I had…one Sunday in early April every year I’d watch the final round of the Masters with my dad.

 

It is a memory I cherish…to this very day…and one I am determined to nurture so it doesn’t fade away.

 

My dad’s been gone for many years…but that hasn’t stopped me yet…every year on a Sunday in early April from turning on the TV set.

 

And watching, in silence, the final round of the Masters…golf balls flying through the air…remembering those precious moment as a child with my dad sitting over there.

 

If anyone were to ask me what I’m doing…perhaps they might think me mad…

when I smile and tell them…not much…just watching the Masters with my dad.

 

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HARD TO BUY FOR

When it came time to picking names for Christmas presents…their Dad was the name no one would vie for…because they all knew, when it came to presents, their dad was hard to buy for.

 

It didn’t matter who put their hand into the hat and drew out their dad’s name…when they asked him what he wanted…his answer was always the same.

 

“I’m surrounded by the beauty of nature and as long as we don’t destroy it…I’ve already been gifted with a number of ways in which I can enjoy it.

 

I can see sunrises and sunsets, hear the birds and smell the flowers too. I can taste the mushrooms from my garden and touch the morning dew.

 

I have a few aches and pains from growing older but I am lucky to be healthy…and though I don’t have a lot of money in the bank…in so many other ways…I’m wealthy.

 

I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food to eat and books to read.  I have the love of my wife, my family and friends…what more do I need?

 

Then he would smile, stare at whoever asked the question that year and say…”I think the best gift would be…if everyone in the world was as hard to buy for as me.”

 

Yes, his children had a hard time buying a present for their dad when it came to Christmas Day...but looking back on all their Christmases together...they wouldn't have had it any other way.

 

 

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REFLECTION

 

I looked into the mirror this morning and I know the light was dim

but for a moment I swear I saw my father…so I waved and smiled at him

 

I didn’t have my glasses on which makes it hard for me to see

 

But I’m pretty sure, for a moment, I saw him smiling back at me


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Daddy Issues

Folder: 
Poems about my dad

I want to know why

Why you left my sister and I

Daddy Issues.

I'd rather be playing outside with you

She'd rather be adoring you

Your company.

But we have daddy issues

Toxicity, dissent, then repent

I don't want to put any blame

I don't want to cry anymore

Daddy Issues.

I loved you, I love you

We become seperated, my role model faded

Anger and hate

I just want them to dissipate

Daddy Issues.

A relationship gone

Family ties cut

I know we still reside, inside

That heart of yours

You don't want to die alone

So you find someone new, no problem with new faces

But why don't your children count

Just watch as the old erases

 

Your company and daddy issues. 

 

We aren't all you have now 

Another family, wow

Find the time, let yourself be seen

A basement's view of someone else

Time dwindles and expires

Your face less seen until erased

Resentment builds, can't you see

Blame it on me.

No matter what you believe

I think we both can agree

Where did the time go?

Blame it on me.

Though, it's not all my fault

Forget the others involved

Disagreement, manipulation, situations

Past it all

Grown now, in my own thoughts

I've come to terms

It doesn't matter anymore

Just blame it on me.

Sleeping with my worries

Your abscense of love back then in my mind, gave me motivation to be something

But imagine the presence of that love back then...

 

If you ever felt pride in me,  I didn't know

 

If you ever cried for me,  I didn't know

 

If you would die for me,  only you would know

 

So let me know.



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DAD JOKES

One of the advantages of being a father and a grandfather…

is something done on my family’s behalf…

to teach my children and grandchildren how to have fun…

how to smile… how to laugh.

 

I take this responsibility seriously…

using humor to give my children and grandchildren a lift…

No need to thank me family…consider it my gift.

 

Through the years my jokes have been so good…I’ve repeated them like clones.

Occasionally they’re met with laughter…more often they’re met with groans.

 

Groans in the beginning…but of this I am proud:

Someday when they get older…I’m sure they’ll laugh out loud.

 

My granddaughter calls them Dad jokes…and they‘re usually met with…”Oh PopPop!”

Dad jokes instead of bad jokes…as if that will ever make me stop.

 

“What time did the man go to the dentist?” I ask, as unsuspecting Ava wonders why.

and she shakes her head and grimaces when…”tooth-thirty!” I reply.

 

Dad jokes…I can live with that label…if it makes my humor all the more bearable.

“Have you heard the joke about a piece of paper?” I ask her

“Never mind…you’ll only think it’s tearable.”

 

“How am I doing, Ava?” I ask. ”Stop me if you’ve heard these before.”

“PopPop please”  Ava pleads holding her hands over her ears…

“I can’t take this anymore!”

 

But I am unperturbed…knowing if this joke doesn’t make her laugh…

or give her a little thrill

I’m sure the next one…or the next one…

or perhaps the next one will!

 

“Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?” I ask.

“Oh, Ava, this is a funny one…you’ll see.”

“Because, as everybody knows,” I say…“pterodactyl has a silent pee.”

 

Wait, hiding there behind that groan…was that a smile I did see?

as a life-long teller of Dad Jokes…that’s good enough for me!

 

Yes, I take this responsibility seriously…my mission is not only to make her smile…

 

Not only to teach her about humor…but to do so…with some style.


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My Father's Dolphins Cap

My dad used to wear this old school 1980s Miami Dolphins cap all the time. Whenever he wasn't at work, or doing something formal, he made sure he had that hat on. He bought it in the good old Orange Bowl back when he lived in Miami, during the 1986 AFC Championship game against the New England Patriots (which the Dolphins surprisingly lost). That would've been the last game the Dolphins played in the legendary Orange Bowl since they moved to Joe Robbie Stadium the next year (now known as Hard Rock Stadium). Anyways, fast forward to September 18, 1997. I was born here in Monterrey, since my dad moved here because of my mom. When I got home from the hospital the first thing my dad did was dress me up in a huge Dan Marino jersey, put that cap on my tiny head, and take a picture of me. That picture is framed in my house to this day. The second I was born my dad had already turned me into a Dolphins' fan. Ever since Dan Marino's prime, my parents' wedding, my birth, Dan Marino's retirement, several depressing Dolphins losing seasons, and just overall tough and not so tough times, that cap has always been in the family. A couple of years ago my dad decided to give it to me and I have it on top of a shelf in my room. I don't wear it much since it is pretty old and worn out, but it means the world to my family and me, it resembles tradition in the family and it certainly is more than just a cap. My dad's loyalty passion for the Dolphins has taught and given me more than I could think of; I hadn't realized it until now that I'm writing this. It has taught me to be there for the people I care about through the toughest of times and stay loyal to them, it has given me more patience throughout the years since the Dolphins haven't been pretty good as of late, thus helping me in other situations where I could use my patience. It has also helped me embrace the little things, I remember watching the only game the Dolphins won during the 2007 1-15 season with my dad. It was an overtime thriller against Baltimore and I remember we celebrated it as if the Dolphins had just won the Super Bowl. Ever since then I know how to make the most out of any and every opportunity. But the thing it has given to me the most, is a special bond between me and my dad. Whenever we have nothing to talk about, we just talk about the Dolphins, if we are ever mad at each other, we just talk about the Dolphins and we forget about it. Every single football Sunday I watch the games with my dad and spend quality father and son time with him. All of this can be symbolized by one simple old-school cap, and that is what makes it so special.

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Superhero

He loved to read me books about Superheroes...
how they’d somehow find a way
to use their super powers...
fight crime
and save the day.

How, even though they could do
what no mortal on Earth could do...
they would only use their power for good...
their hearts were pure
and true.

And I wanted to be just like them.
I wanted to be that guy
imbued with super powers
who could fly across the sky.

But it didn’t take me long to realize
that wasn’t meant to be...
and the real Super Hero
was the man who read those books to me.

Daddy angel

Folder: 
poems 1

She is wrap in 
a pink blanket
She is my everything 
she is wrap around 
my little pinky 
Daddy angel 
Daddy angel 
Daddy angel 
She is wrap in 
a pink blanket 
She is my everything 
she is wrap around 
my little pinky she is 
my world she is 
a daddy girl
Daddy angel 
Daddy angel 
I love hearing her 
calling me daddy 
and she is all 
grow up now
Daddy angel 
It is like yesterday 
she was a baby
She will always 
be my baby girl
Daddy angel. 
© Amanda Kay Hill
8/18/16

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