I awaken with such deep sadness.
Liquid fills and drizzles down my cheeks.
The love I've had hasn't died.
But the closest touch, I have denied.
All so I could focus more.
On the story I've been after.
But if I'd stayed in that place we were.
He would've driven me crazy forever.
I miss the daily, I love you's.
I miss the nightly hugs and kisses too.
Today, the sadness infects my spirit.
I have to find a way to clear it.
For there's no moving forward if I'm shackled by the past.
And this next adventure, I want to last.
She will love you.
More than I ever could.
For I am not that capable,
of the love that she'll provide.
She looks like she is perfect,
to light your world on fire.
Hot and loving with words so sweet.
Have fun my dear, I can't compete.
Lost to enchantment - scattered to farewell,
failed trappings of a heart longing to stay
Smiles into tears, recalling bittersweet dreams,
whimsies and love - somehow tossed to the way
Stammers in darkness - echoing each failing word;
shadows of sunset prompting whispered cries
Dimness speaking direst shades to woeful fate,
pleading voice mimics soul's anguished demise
Bequeathed with passion and caressed by night;
a jewel of fancy - like a ruby red kiss
Shimmered the gem's reflection in your eyes,
a sparkling fortune founded in bliss
Then faded the glimmer of our opulent light,
facet turning to a shard of murky glass
With fall that shatters from cruelty's fate,
the final slivers of hope came to pass
In dwell of aloneness come last goodbyes,
my thoughts forever in the surrounding still
Come years to pass --- you'll find me here,
my spirit to love you, and always will
© C.E.Vance
The thing is, I always believed he would let me down.
And as I got more and more attached to his spirit,
I just got this sinking feeling.
... We will never meet ...
Somewhere down the road, he will let me down.
I did want him for my very own.
But I knew, It couldn't be.
His situation, wasn't free.
Alone she sits.
Dreaming of her lover.
He left her.
Abandoned.
She wonders what happened.
She remembers.
He was not alone.
For He had another.
I miss you.
My heart will not forget.
Tears trickle here too.
I'm not over you.
I don't know what to do.
Was it really too good to be true?
Within this heart, I felt pain.
A kind i cannot explain.
I thought it was hate or anger.
But I was feeling betrayed.
Abandoned in a labyrinth.
Left to starve alone.
Though in my heart,
my one true love
had finally found a home.
I ran away questioning.
What have I just done?
I left my heart upon a shelf
Abandoning my love.
Still I cannot help but want
to heal the hearts I see.
But how can I accomplish this
when my own heart sits and bleeds?
Ultimately.
It seems to me.
I'm nobody special.
So don't listen to me.
I would not agree.
If you called me sweet.
I used to light fires under your feet.
I'd hide behind windows to be discreet.
Now it's all but a fading memory.
Of a love that was grand and meant a lot to me.