Even When It's Not Christmas

Folder: 
2017

I will not tell you

what I want to

in this world

Talking like that is

laying myself

bare

such a steep hill

to start

 

When the words

open with a question

you can watch me

close

 

I don’t ask,

just wait,

maybe wanting

will make truth

 

but sometimes

when the wind blows

when the leaves fall

when the snow sticks

I don’t need questions or answers

when I’m this close to you

 

I could fall down at your door

I think I’d end up with

too many bruises

but I wouldn’t mind

as long as I can paint them on your wall

so your story knows

I was here

 

Sometimes that

silent crash

breaks the glass

around the world

 

The rustles say I’m a mess

but I’m a mess with you

under these Christmas lights

 

My heart is made of

answers that won’t break

The next time

it’s a dragon-cold night

I don’t have to tell you what I want

but I will still whisper it to the window

the fog will find your hands

and they will be around me

just when I need

 

and then the ground thaws

and you’re still here

 

you can’t know

how much that means

to me

 

Even when it’s not Christmas

I know there is someone

who loves me

I hope I can be that

 

for you

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 12/18/17

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